Beyond the Metanarrative?

A few months ago, Thomas Beatie wrote a first person narrative for "The Advocate" recounting some of his experiences being a pregnant trans-man.  While he is not the first man to ever be pregnant, he and his wife made a decision to take their story to the mainstream public.  "The Advocate" is a widely read LGBT magazine that is both in print and online, and Beatie even had an interview with Oprah (which I did not see).  

Beatie's stories of dealing with medical professionals echoes the experiences trans folks have had with access to health care more broadly, for example, doctors turning him away, refusing to use male pronouns, etc.  These accounts are similar to the accounts of Robert Eads in the film "Southern Comfort" and his struggles with ovarian cancer.  The sex/gender binary can block access to healthcare and this block can often be life-threatening for trans people.    

What is interesting in relation to Beatie's account of his pregnancy are the reactions from people, absolutely unwilling and unable to see Beatie as a man because pregnancy is seen to be the defining characteristics of being a woman/femininity.  One doctor states, "As a licensed medical doctor I can assure you that this "man" is in reality a female who simply had their breasts removed and are taking male hormones.  This in turn could disturb the child's normal neo-natal growth in her body" (Kravitz).  This doctor in fact is referring to Beatie's possession of female reproductive organs and condescendingly puts "man" in quotations implying falsity, an imposter.  Also, he does not find it necessary to say what "normal" neo-natal growth is for a fetus.  It seems to me that if Beatie's body can menstruate and get pregnant, the fetus has a chance of growing just fine.  Meyerowitz, in the telling of a history of transgendered people and medical professionals says, 

the conflicts involved issues of knowledge and power...the doctors had the cultural authority, whether or not they had ever encountered, studied, or thought about transsexuality...doctors also had the power to determine exactly who would qualify for treatment (375).  

Kravitz, the "licensed medical doctor" took it upon himself to "assure" the public of the reality of Beatie's situation.  Meyerowitz tells of how the medical gaze got turned back on itself during the early struggles of transgendered people demanding access to healthcare.  

One might think that Beatie's story in the mainstream public could disrupt people's expectations of the gender binary and the authority of the medical gaze, but I argue that despite Beatie's pregnancy, he has fallen into using tropes of masculinity v. femininity in defending his position.  Beatie says, "I am stable and confident being the man that I am...I will be my daughter's father, and Nancy will be her mother.  We will be a family" (Beatie).  As Sandy Stone so succinctly puts it, "who is telling the story for whom, and how do the storytellers differentiate between the story they tell and the story they hear" (295)?  

works cited: Beatie, Thomas. "Labor of Love." The Advocate. 26 March 2008. 18 May 2008 http://www.advocate.com/exclusive_detail_ektid52947.asp?page=2.

Kravitz, Abner. Online comment. "Transgendered man claims he's pregnant with a girl." 26 March 2008. 18 May 2008 http://www.ctv.ca/servlet/ArticleNews/story/CTVNews/20080326/pregnant_man_080326/20080326?hub=Health.

Meyerowitz, Joanne. "A "Fierce and Demanding" Drive." The Transgender Studies Reader. Ed. Susan Stryker and Stephen Whittle. New York: Routledge, 2006. 

Stone, Sandy. "The Empire Strikes Back." The Visible Woman: Imaging Technologies, Gender, and Science." Ed. Paula A. Treichler, Lisa Cartwright, and Constance Penley. New York: New York University Press, 1998. 285-309. 

Visual Imaging Technologies

http://4dbaby.com/

If you look under the "Samples" section of the website you will see side by side shots of the face of the fetus using this technology and the face of the newborn baby.  This comparison of visual images encourages a viewing of the unborn fetus as a life that is viable outside of the mother's womb.  The quote on the site says, "clarity in 4d ultrasound images provides a true First Look at infants facial features" (First Look Sonogram).  This kind of visual imaging has discursive repercussions around reproductive freedoms and furthers to individualize fetuses while marginalizing the status and health of the mother.  

Carol Stabile's article, "Shooting the Mother: Fetal Photography and the Politics of Disappearance," looks at how visual technologies have played a role in the erasure of women's bodies.  She argues that, "representations of "fetal personhood" depend upon the erasure of female bodies and the reduction of women to passive, reproductive machines" (172).  While this erasure has a panoply of causes, fetal representations are particularly powerful in a society that is saturated in and highly influenced by visual imagery.  

Similar to the argument made below in the discussion of "The Onion" article, visual imaging can create a dangerous situation where the fetus is given personhood over the mother and in turn threaten reproductive freedoms (see below).

works cited: "First Look Sonogram." 12 May 2008 http://4dbaby.com/

Stabile, Carol. "Shooting the Mother: Fetal Photography and the Politics of Disappearance." The Visible Woman: Imaging Technologies, Gender, and Science. Ed. Paula A. Treichler, Lisa Cartwright, and Constance Penley. New York: New York University Press, 1998. 171-197. 

Friend #2 Answers to Questionnaire

1. I worked with a system called Hypno-Birthing. Every night I would do exercises based in imagery and self-hypnosis (deep relaxation). The exercises originated with different breathing techniques. Also the general idea is to envision an easy painless birth and not to listen to or read about stories that created any fear or tension. So I avoided listening to other people’s birth stories. I also did some work with the Pink Book – which is a series of exercises and birth positions put together by some Australian midwives. It was particularly helpful in finding better positions during labor and finding ones that were best for me even if they were really simple like lying on my side.

2. Once a month during most of the pregnancy and then once a week towards the end. At the very end I went in every three days or so for non-stress tests because I was considered late.

3. I started off with a regular ObGyn and then after I had all of my pre-natal tests complete (I did amnio) then I worked with a midwife for the remainder of my pregnancy.

4. I always knew I wanted a mid-wife. Because of my family history (mainly my mom’s and my twin sister’s) with birthing I knew that I needed more time and less intervention if I was going to have a vaginal birth.

5. I went into labor at home. I self-induced with castor oil – yuck. I wish that I had the patience to wait a few more days, but my baby was already 3 weeks + past my due date.

6. I gave birth at Alta-Bates birthing center and it was fantastic.

7. I had a vaginal birth. But came very close to having a c-section. William was almost 101bs with a big head and I was in labor for 2 days. But it worked out. My doula was amazing. Well worth every cent we paid her. I would not birth without a doula! And my midwife was patient and had great delivery techniques. Lots of oil and great timing.

8. We (myself and my midwife and doula) agreed that an epidural would have increased my chance of having a c-section. So I waited long enough and went through transition and then it was time to push.

9. Yes I did have a birthing plan, but the work with hypno-birthing really teaches you to give yourself over to the birth and not to have too many expectations. I left it open and trusted that the birth was going to go the way it was going to go, rather than putting any absolutes on anything. I was born c-section and had no issue giving birth c-section if that was going to happen. I really worked on positive energy and openness to what was going to happen.

10. No not really other than it took a very long time and I had little relief between contractions. I would say it was more mentally taxing then I had anticipated. But I never felt over-run by the labor. I felt very in the moment and experienced a kind of trance state. I wish it had gone faster but in hind sight my fear is what kept it from progressing faster. So it just took me a while to let myself give over to the birth and to really listen to William. I think he wanted to take his time transitioning into the world as well. So – I am ok that it took so long.

11. I keep thinking about how when I was home I didn’t want to lie on my side because it felt like it really opened me up so much to the birth. I realize now that sitting was my way to control the birthing. If I have another child I will know what to expect more and will give over to the feeling much sooner because it really was about a deep opening and I didn’t need to worry so much about that feeling. Also my training as a dancer is the opposite for birthing. It felt out of control to let myself release. Now that I have done it once I know that my body and my baby would not go against me, that my mind could have taken a back seat sooner. But it all worked out in the end. That is the way it was supposed to be. The pushing was great because then I was able to have some power again and I felt William working with me. The more we worked together the better the pushing went. I actually look back at that moment in the labor and smile because it was so wonderful and it was at the end of two days! I really felt him wanting to come into the world. Oh that is an exciting time. I absolutely was amazed to see William enter the world. I remember deeply the feeling of great accomplishment and exaltation – well worth 10 months of pregnancy.

Friend #1 Answers to Questionnaire

1. i have been a professional dancer all my life, which has prepared me for any kind of bodily experience...from exercise to trauma to birthing. i figured: when (the shit hit the fan or) things got intense, i would breathe!!! i also figured: women have been doing this for years, so how bad could it be?!

2. about once a month

3. female ob-gyn

4. i spoke with friends who had been pregnant and did some research and took abirthing class (just one day)
-then i got a doula (early on) and talked through some options.
-i am very decisive, but knew that birthing can bring forth unexpected circumstances, so i wanted to do what would be best for my baby. thus, i had decided that if i were to be induced with pitocin that i would request an epidural. i've heard that pitocin makes contractions much more painful than "natural" birthing pain, and i also became aware that dosages of epidurals are minimal these days, allowing you to labor and feel the contractions, which i found to be true. i was overdue and had to be induced (first with a balloon-type device overnight, then with pitocin in the morning). i requested the epidural, and everything went so smoothly that i would do it again in a heartbeat.

5. hospital: alta bates, berkeley

6. hospital: alta bates, berkeley

7. vaginally

8. yes

9. the plan was: don't overplan. i mean, would you plan your death? exactly. i knew that if i were to get pitocin that i would also request an epidural. i also knew that before it got unbearable i might also request an epidural. in the event of an emergency c-section, it is good to already have anepidural in place to avoid general anaesthesia. also, those trippy paindrugs (not the epidurals but the ones that make you loopy) remove some of your capacity to act rationally---they make you "out of it"---so i prefer the localization of the epidural, which numbs (only partially) your body, but not your brain.

10. not exactly, but there was one (only one) irregular heartbeat during my check up the day before i was supposed to be induced (planned), so they induced that night instead to avoid any future irregular heartbeats during contractions. this was probably extra precautionary, but it was fine with me to be "better safe than sorry."

11. i am someone who knows my body well, and i really trusted both my instincts and medical knowledge. in other words, i did not buy into the myth that a"completely natural" birth (without drugs) is the best way to go. i loved my epidural and still had a completely involved birthing experience, pushing with each contraction and all! it was easy as pie and very straightforward. i used a combination of prior/existing bodily knowledge, doula's advice(and coaching during labor; plus husband coaching/soothing with her), and advice from my friends/books with medical knowledge.
-i found the second trimester the most energetic, and even performed in and choreographed a dance duet for myself and another 7-month pregnant dancer. nevertheless, i was not at all obsessed about working out, dancing, or exercising during pregnancy, and i find this to be an asset. pregnancy is not olympic training, and it's most important to listen to one's body, cravings, rest impulses, etc. i took prenatal vitamins. i also engaged in a fairly strenuous academic schedule, but then rested a lot the last month. and slept a lot throughout. and ate a ton. i gained 40 pounds, and was comfortable with it. i think that it's important to find a great source of advice during one's first pregnancy, such as a doula or best friend.

Pregnancy and Birthing Questionnaire

1. What kind of physical preparations did you make for giving birth, if any? For example, breathing exercises, mediation, etc.

2. How often would you go in for check-ups while pregnant?

3. Was this with an obstetrician or a midwife or both?

4. How did you decide which type of assistance during the birthing process you wanted?

5. Where did you go into labor?

6. Where did you give birth?

7. Did you give birth vaginally or by cesarean section?

8. Did you have an epidural?

9. Did you have a birthing plan?

10. Did you encounter any "complications" during your pregnancy or labor?

11. Briefly describe any details about your pregnancy, laboring, and/or birthing process that you find interesting.